Birthday | Ohio

I must first apologize to all of my die hard fans [all seven of you... okay, okay... all three of you. Okay, fine, sorry mom] for the long wait.  After all, I know my life and well-being is the constant worry of humankind.

I will be posting about the following:

[1] Maddux's birthday
[2] Going to Ohio | the Fundraiser/Benefit

Here we go....

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[1] Maddux's Birthday 

Happy birthday, dude! I can't believe my little one has turned one already.  ONE! All throughout the day I recounted the memory of May 16, 2009.  It seems like eternities ago I was in the hospital, having contractions, and asking my nurse for a Diet Coke with some limes. The doctor put that 21 inch, 7 lb 4 oz slime ball on my chest, and I fell in love. The concept of love amazes me.  I look at this little 21 pound chunk and my eyes fill with tears.  I can't believe he's mine.  He's all mine... forever.

The birthday event went well.  Our awesome upstairs neighbors came down for cake and presents.

  

Present: success.

Balloons: success.

Cake: success.

Birthday hat: double failure.

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Maddux grows older every day [okay, obviously]. I can't believe how fast he is growing!  He's not a baby anymore--he's a little boy.  He's so close to walking; He jabbers all the time [which I love]; He is content to play by himself; He is always laughing and smiling; He's drinking whole milk [I totally miss nursing; I loved it.]; He gets SO excited when hears the water on the tub turn on; He crawls on his feet and hands--not his knees; He loves spinning in circles on the ground; HE LOVES BEING OUTSIDE.

 

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[2] The Benefit | Ohio

Going to Ohio was a breath of fresh air--mingled with an occasional gulp of unexpected car exhaust.

I vividly remember walking in the front door being so anxious to see my dad.  I had butterflies in my stomach. I couldn't wait for him to open his big, strong arms and give me one of his bear hugs. I turned the corner and felt like a tsunami hit.  The butterflies were gone and replaced by a pit--a churning lump in my stomach. I forced myself to smile and breath. There was the strongest man I knew.  He was sitting on the leather sofa. Pale. Extremely fatigued. Eyelids drooping. Forced smile. Skinny. Cold sweats. It took everything in me to not barricade myself in the bathroom and cry.  The recovery from surgery was taking a toll I hadn't expected. My mom's preparation of 'your dad's having a more difficult day today' didn't do him justice. Thankfully, that was the worst day.

I could see him improve every day.  Over the next two weeks his recovery took a launch into spectacular. When I left, I was leaving the dad I remembered. The dad without cancer. The dad who slides into the kitchen with his socks. The dad who makes jokes. The dad who dances and sings down the stairs in the morning.

I was surprised at the worry I felt for my mom. I could only detect so much over the phone.  To be in Ohio, in her element, was difficult.  My mom--the most emotional being I know--was at times void of emotions. Numb. That was hard for me to see. It was a roller coaster.

The benefit was amazing.  HUNDREDS [and I do not use that number lightly] of people came to support my parents. To read more about the benefit, see my sister's blog here.

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Maddux thought my dad was hilarious.  Every time my dad would come in the room Maddux would light up inside and give the biggest smiles a little one-year-old could muster.

He loves his grandma.  He will always sit and relax with grandma.

Uma is only one who can rock him to sleep.

The wonderful women I had so much fun with.